Eating right? Check. Exercising? Work in Progress. H. Pylori Bacterium? Check.
What??? H. Pylori? Are you kidding me? How did THAT happen?
Helicobacter pylori (English pronunciation: /ˌhɛlɨkɵˈbæktər pɪˈlɔraɪ/) is a Gram-negative, microaerophilic bacterium that can inhabit various areas of the stomach, particularly the antrum. It causes a chronic low-level inflammation of the stomach lining and is strongly linked to the development of duodenal and gastric ulcers and stomach cancer. Over 80 percent of individuals infected with the bacterium are asymptomatic.
The bacterium was initially named Campylobacter pyloridis, then renamed C. pylori (pylori being the genitive of pylorus) to correct aLatin grammar error. When 16S ribosomal RNA gene sequencing and other research showed in 1989 that the bacterium did not belong in the genus Campylobacter, it was placed in its own genus, Helicobacter. The genus derived from the ancient Greek hělix/έλιξ “spiral” or “coil”. The specific epithet pylōri means “of the pylorus” or pyloric valve (the circular opening leading from the stomach into the duodenum), from the Ancient Greek word πυλωρός, which means gatekeeper.
More than 50% of the world’s population harbor H. pylori in their upper gastrointestinal tract. Infection is more prevalent in developing countries, and incidence is decreasing in Western countries. H. pylori’s helix shape (from which the generic name is derived) is thought to have evolved to penetrate the mucoid lining of the stomach.
If you have been following, you may remember I ended up in the ER a few weeks ago with GI bleeding. Well, I ended up back in to see the doctor this past week and I get to have one of those wonderful colonoscopies (I am feeling the jealousy sweep all over you right this very second). Nothing more exciting than being starved for a few days, forced to drink some “drano type” liquid, knocked out and having someone get all personal with a microscope.
Me, having the sense of humor that I do, I thought maybe I would leave some sort of message that morning with an arrow. Perhaps I will write “Entrance to Cave of Wonders” with an arrow. I have to get a little fun out of this most invasive procedure. Some people cry or get angry when they have medical issues, for me, I just have to find the humor in it all. It could be worse, my armpits could be infested with the fleas of a thousand camels so we will just go with this! : )
In the meantime, I get to take some incredibly awesome medications to eradicate the Helicobacter bacterium. These pharmaceutical companies must be in bed with the toilet paper manufacturers and are making bank in revenue because I can’t seem to leave the lady’s room”. If you haven’t considered a stock purchase in toilet paper, now might be a good time?! I also don’t have an appetite at all which is a tremendous plus for my weight loss endeavors right now so I am hoping to see some nice results over the next 14 wonderful days. Oh and I can not consume any alcohol during this time. Lovely. It just gets better and better. Smirnoff may see a rapid decline in their cranberry flavored vodka sales at this time, my apologies.
On an excellent note…
Tomorrow I begin my new career and I couldn’t be more thrilled. Well, perhaps if I wasn’t on medication that makes me feel like a beaver is chewing on my insides, and perhaps if The Juicy Cafe was located next to my work and perhaps if my favorite former co-workers were with me… but besides that, life is grand! : )