The Sandwich

Bread is something that I tend to avoid due to my gluten intolerance.  While I do not have Celiac, I do tend to feel like I am going to die when I ingest gluten…

At lunch time my husband tossed a menu on my desk at work and suddenly TUNA FISH SANDWICH just seemed to jump out off the page.  A sandwich! I hadn’t had a sandwich in so long and I could almost taste the tuna fish cradled on the bed of lettuce and tomato.  Yes! I had to have it.  It couldn’t be that bad right!?  I would suffer the consequences later (if there were any).  I was excited because a tuna fish sandwich was a fairly healthy choice for my lunch with no sides of any kind.  YAY ME!  While my husband was running to get the food I was sitting there as impatient as Liz Taylor in front of a microwave awaiting this little goody.

As I started to bite into this square piece of heaven the equally gluten-intolerant receptionist comes into my office, drops her mouth wide open and says, ‘IS THAT GLUTEN-FREE???”  “Um, no, no it is not and I am going to eat it.”  She rushed out of my office in disgust like I had just announced I had H1N1.

What the hell was I thinking?  Oh my gosh this was one of the biggest mistakes I had made since marrying my first husband!  No sooner had I taken the last bite and was basking in the glory of how delicious my lunch had been when all of a sudden I was overcome with cramping and nausea.  That is when the receptionist slips back in to my office  and tells me there is a marketing consultant on the line for me.  ARE YOU SERIOUS?  Suddenly I am caught up in playing twenty questions on the phone and all I want is the ladies room.  The guy on the other end of the phone sounded like Charlie Brown’s teacher.

As I got of the phone I ran past the receptionist desk and chastised her for allowing me to eat the sandwich and granted her full authority to knock the next one out of my hand should that ever happen again.  This may not have happened if it weren’t for the fact that I am running out of ideas for chicken!!!

Lesson learned?  I would hope so!


4 thoughts on “The Sandwich

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