I awoke yesterday eagerly anticipating setting my mom up on Skype. We live at opposites ends of the country and I haven’t been home to see my mom in quite some time, this was going to be great! : )
I know my mom isn’t computer savvy but she has clearly mastered email enough to forward on things to me that require me to send them out to 8 people or I will be dead by early morning so how hard could walking her through this process be?
After a half an hour to 45 minutes of my mom clicking on Skype and me trying to navigate her to the sign in page, I had to walk her through re-creating an account because the original one that was set up was not working. After having her set up her account again the following conversation took place…
Beth: Mom, are you certain you have Skype downloaded into your computer? Take a look at your desktop, do you see the Skype icon there?
Mom: I DO HAVE SKYPE I AM CLICKING ON IT NOW. There isn’t any icon on my desktop!
Beth: Are you sure there isn’t an icon on your desktop? That is really odd Ma, the page that you are going to is not the actual sign in page, you need to look for something that reads SIGN IN. Ma, what are you clicking on?
Mom: I do have Skype, it is in my favorites. I have had enough of this crap, this is stupid. I have things to do today, I will call you back later.
Hours later my phone rings…
Mom: Thank you for the flowers but you shouldn’t have sent me those since you aren’t working.
Beth: I always send you flowers on your birthday mom, Happy Birthday, I love you Ma. By the way Ma, it hit me after you hung up the phone that you have Skype on your internet shortcuts which takes you to the internet but it may not be downloaded in your computer. I think I may have to walk you through the download process.
Mom: NO! I do have it! It came with my laptop and says so. (Therefore I must believe this to be true, right!?)
Beth: Ma, listen to me. You said there isn’t an icon on your desktop so we have to download it in order for me to be able to connect to you. You have to have the program actually installed Ma.
Mom: I DO HAVE SKYPE, IT’S IN MY PROGRAMS!
Beth: WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT IS IN YOUR PROGRAMS??? I HAVE BEEN ASKING YOU IF YOU HAD SKYPE ON YOUR DESKTOP ALL MORNING! GEEZ MA!
Mom: It isn’t on my desktop, it’s in my programs!
Beth: *grumbles and swears quietly under my breath. My gosh Ma, I must have asked you ten times if you had Skype in there! Ma, click on it, sign in and we can talk!!!
Mom: You asked me if it was on my desktop and it’s not, it’s in my programs and no I can’t do it right now because I am riding in the car. I will call you back later, love you.
Beth: *Hangs up and collapses into chair holding my face in hands. *Swears a bit more.
Phone rings in the evening…
Mom: Ok, sorry I couldn’t talk earlier. So, what do I have to do so I can use this Skype?
Beth: Go to your programs and click on it and once it opens, sign in.
Mom: Alright. I did that, nothing is happening.
Beth: Nothing is popping up on the screen?
Mom: Nope, nuthin.
Beth: Ok Ma, I think we just have to download Skype again. I want you to go to the internet…
Mom: Is that GOOGLE?
Beth: Yes Ma, go to GOOGLE. At the top type in the following…*gives Ma an internet address to type in.
Mom: What’s a forward slash? (Seriously?)
Beth: Look to the right of your keyboard where the numbers are. Do you see the the slanted dash above the number 9 Ma? That’s a forward slash. *grabs letter opener and fakes a hara-kiri while son laughs
Mom: Are you guys making fun of me?
Beth: Yes Ma, yes we are.
Mom: It’s not funny, I don’t know how to do this crap. (Really? I wouldn’t have thought that)
Once Skype is downloaded…
Beth: Do you see an icon there Ma?
Mom: No, there isn’t one.
Beth: I don’t understand Ma, let’s just download it again and instead of hitting “save” just hit “run” so I can talk to you. *cringes at the thought of her typing in that address again.
I see my mom’s face for the first time in years….Finally we get to chat for about 5 minutes when we get kicked off…
Mom: The icon that was there is gone now.
Beth: That is because we didn’t save the program mom, I don’t know what you are doing but something isn’t right.
Mom: I AM DOING EVERYTHING YOU TOLD ME TO DO. I am getting out of all this crap on my computer, we can do this another time…*exits out of everything on her desktop and says….Hey, there is that Skype icon underneath all of the things I had up on my computer.
Beth: ON YOUR DESKTOP MA??? YOU HAD THE ICON ON YOUR DESKTOP THIS WHOLE TIME??? THAT IS YOUR “DESKTOP”!
Mom: I DIDN’T KNOW THAT WAS MY DESKTOP!!! I TOLD YOU IT WAS LOADED IN MY COMPUTER.
Beth: FOR CRYING OUT LOUD MA!
Mom: I didn’t know that was my desktop. *I then imagined her searching all over her desk when I had asked her if she had and icon on her desktop! ; )
Beth: Ok, well click on it so we can chat, I want to see you on your birthday!
I finally get to chat with my mom for longer than 5 minutes face to face…
Beth: Happy Birthday Ma, I love you. : )
Mom: It is good to see you, this is great! I love you, too!
What a day! So now I am able to Skype with my Ma. : )
On the weight loss front: I weighed in this morning at 213.2 …glad to see the numbers going down!!!